Monday, August 6, 2007

support group


It's hard when people let you down. Trust crumbles and soon the only thing you can count on them for is disappointment. I don't mean to rag on people and I'm not going to name names but it just feels like that is the way the tide is turning right now.

On the other hand, looking the glass-half-full, it does give one an astute sense of who they can count on by seeing who consistently comes through for you. I love my friends (and that includes my rock, Dean).

I had a video showing today. I do these things because I think they should be done. I don't look for a pat on the back, congrats or a payment. I just want them done. In this case, I wanted to show 'Hard Pill' which is a drama about a pill that could turn gays straight. I opted for this film because it's timely. However, I ended up working at the showing by myself (for the first time) and for the first time ever at one of these showings, the movie wouldn't work. I ended up showing 'Beautiful Thing' instead which is one of my top ten and a way better film, although not as immediately relevant. I was really upset at the advertised movie not working so much so that I wanted to start yelling and throwing shit. Still, I got to show one of my favs and it turned out okay. I think it left me in a better mood than 'Hard Pill' would have anyway. How's that for half-full?

Anyway, I've been counting on help from friends and comrades this past weekend and tonight. I was a little disappointed in broken promises and abandonments but it was reassuring to see other people consistently show up and come through.

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