that other reality

Last week, while we were enjoying the beginning of Country Fair, one of our friends passed away. Since I've been in Portland, I've only had to attend two funerals. One was for my co-worker's child and the other was for my grandma. I consider Portland to be a wonderland of sorts and death doesn't belong here. Today, I had to face that, even here, death is a reality that will still find us eventually.

I can't say that I knew Syd very well. We had only met a handful of times but I was more acquainted with his partner, Cat. Syd has faced a long and grueling battle with cancer, only to pass away due to the doctors' denials that it had returned. Cat's been with him for over 20 years. I can't imagine what she's going through.

Yesterday was Syd's funeral which was referred to as a celebration of life. It was hard for me to view it that way when I didn't know him very well and I could see that my friend was so clearly suffering. Despite the imposing religiousness of the ceremony and sermon (Syd wasn't a church-goer) and the meat at the reception (Syd was an animal rights activist), it was nice to have such a large gathering of people there to honor Syd's memory. It was also a lovely setting, on the marina on Hayden Island.

Afterwards, Cat wanted to go to the beach so we made that happen. Ashes, Victory, Josie, Jesse, Lori, Cat and I all headed to Manzanita at sunset. We didn't really have a plan other than to get to the beach. Normally, I would have had to bow out of the trip due to Dean but Sophia was able to care for him. Cat also had her little dog Buddha so I bought some treats for her.

 

It was a long drive but it was also nice to be with friends. We got to the beach after dark. None of us were really prepared for a beach trip so we didn't even have jackets, except for Cat fortunately. Initially, Lori was going to rent us a hotel room and told us to buy some food. When we found out all of the hotels were booked, we just sat on the beach by a campfire. The beach was calm and beautiful and not too cold or windy. Sometime after midnight, we decided to head back to Portland. I drove Ashes' car and he drove Lori's since hers was a stick shift and she was too tired to drive. We didn't get back until this morning at 3am.

I love my friends. I love that they would be up for going to the beach at the last minute at the wishes of a friend in need without any attempt to dissuade her or push their own agendas. We're a special bunch and I don't want to lose any more of us.

What else?
In witnessing Syd's ceremony, I would like to get out of making a will right now and instead opt to do the cheap version by posting my wishes on my blog. I don't want a priest there, especially one who doesn't know me. I haven't gone to church in a long time and that's been a conscious decision. To have my funeral be overtly religious would be to dishonor my memory. If I change my mind one day down the road, I will update this. I would have the people from the Spirit Booth at Community Village do their thing but that's not a requirement. Also, I don't want meat served but dairy is fine. I want whatever animal I may own to be there and I want to be cremated. There's a cliff outside Manzanita where my ashes could be dumped but don't pull a Lebowski and let them fly back in your face.

I haven't been taking a lot of pictures lately so I haven't been updating my blog this week but here's what's happened:

On Monday, July 16th, I woke early in the morning at camp and registered for classes on my I-Phone. I got into the class with my instructor that I had for my generalist class which went along with my internship two years ago. I'm thrilled about that. Also, on the ride home, Tomas taught me how to play Backgammon. I was exhausted and not in the right state of mind to learn the game but I think I got the concept down.

On Tuesday, July 17th, I was hit by a car on my bike. I was and still am 100% fine. I was biking in a crosswalk that pedestrians were in as well on Powell and 28th by the McDonalds. The eastbound traffic stopped and a car was slowing in the westbound traffic but she didn't hit her brake all of the way. I was in front of her when I noticed she wasn't actually going to stop but I couldn't speed past her because I didn't know if the cars in the right lane were going to stop or slow down at all. She tapped by back tire and my bike stopped so I jumped off. I cussed at her and then saw she was maybe in her mid-80s. She pulled over and gave me her info. I released the quick release on my tire and it fell back into place. She told me to get it looked at and I had to spend a good amount of time consoling her. Maybe I should have called the cops because I don't think she should be driving still but I'm hoping she'll realize that on her own.

On Wednesday, July 18th, I got my bike checked out. Corey at Seven Corners had to true the tire but it was fine other than that and he didn't charge me anything because he's super-awesome. I bussed out to Clackamas for a store visit for the first time.

On Thursday, July 19th, I went to Veggie Grill for the first time. I also picked up a book on defending animals called the Bond. I like it so far but it makes me want to quit my job and devote my life to animal activism. Later on, Ashes and I picked up the door for Sophia's room from the store and I bought a spring which I used to fix the front screen door. I also went to the Hunger Games with Jesse. It was okay but a bit long. I'm impressed that I managed to stay awake through it all since it's almost a three hour movie and it didn't start until 9:15pm.

On Friday, July 20th, I made chocolate walnut cookies for Syd's service. I was also thinking that I would bring them to a BBQ that Andrew and I were going to at his friends Mark and Emily's house but they weren't cooled in time.