Ugh, this sucks to have to write about but it comes up way too often and it's pretty unavoidable. The term rape culture is used to describe a culture in which sexual violence (typically against females) is common, accepted, expected or overlooked. It's absolutely horrifying and unbelievable but it's out there and unfortunately it's not rare. Gawd, I hate humanity sometimes.
It'd be nice to think that with every new day, we come one step closer to doing away with rape culture. Like all forms of hate and intolerance (except again haters), I hope that it will all just evolve out of our system. Yet, some forms of hate are so ingrained in society that they're like bed bugs. Just when you think you got rid of them, they flare up again and you're better off just leaving everything behind and moving. However, with rape culture, we tend to just ignore it and hope it goes away.
People grow up with violence in their house and just accept it as the norm, carry into another house and keep the cycle going. The media doesn't exactly discourage it. It shows misogynistic assholes and glorifies them. The government and legal system has proved to be incompetent at dealing with them and at reform instead of just wrist slapping (castration, anyone?). Hell, the military refuses to give rape victims any protection or hope for retribution.
While I would love to think of my small Portland culture as being above the rest of the world in this matter, we're not. There are better, more community-driven ways of confronting rapists within the community. It should also be added by 'community,' I mean punks, anarchists, radicals, etc. We're supposed to be anti-patriarchy, supportive of each other and accountable for our issues. However, not all people within this community are on the same page. While most people that I would expect to identify themselves as members of the community would hopefully agree that full-on, attack, forcible rape is horrendous, some people have different definitions when alcohol is involved.
This is yet another reason why I hate alcohol. It can impair your judgment or just black you out completely. If one person's drunk and has their judgment impaired and a sober person takes advantage of them, it is rape. It's not consensual. If it isn't rape, then there's no such thing as a rape drug which I think most people would agree there is. It works under the same philosophy. Yet, when both people are drunk, is anyone really to blame. The lines become a lot more blurry then although there may still be coercion involved.
Yesterday, I worked the door for an event at the space and heard new artists. I also had to help watch the door when we were fully expecting a rapist to walk through the door. At many venues, this would be ignored. However, we do not endorse, support or ignore rapists. My housemates called him out, confronted him and made him wait by the front while calling his accountability coordinator. It was an uncomfortable situation for all involved but I don't see how anyone can argue that it was the right thing. The guy was a jerk about it and that probably has a lot to do with the fact that he was caught off-guard. I don't think that enough people have stood up to him and called him on being accused of rape which they should. I think that if rapists were called out more often and more publicly, it would be a hindrance to rape culture. However, people need to work to support the survivors more. Calling someone out is an intense experience and it would be unimaginably difficult for a survivor to confront someone in a public venue when he is surrounded by his friends. So they need support, like my awesome housemates. I love knowing that I am surrounded by the right type of people.
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